Blog 567: Anachronox

Gosh, I thought Daikatana was bad for the whooshy camera, but that was small fry compared to Anachronox. Definitely not a game for sufferers of motion sickness — even for me, a veteran of the lightning-fast FPS, some of the camera movements get just a bit too wonky.

So Anachronox is a… turn-based? … comedy RPG from 2001.


Once you get past the whooshy cameras, there is a vibrant setting here, reminiscent of a rather tongue-in-cheek version of Star Wars. Starting on an alien techno-planet that rearranges its surface every so often (this is a convenient way to wall off some areas until plot-appropriate), you play a wise-cracking private detective and his motley crew of oddballs as you explore and do stuff.

The plot escalates fairly fast, and it’s a grand adventure in the way of truly classic RPGs — humble beginnings spiralling out into the very fate of the world (or because it’s a sci-fi, the universe). Despite its overt comedy, though, there are plenty of thoughtful and emotional asides; unlike the Mass Effects of this world where character development tends to only occur when you poke the team members between battles, here the companions are tightly wound into the fabric of the main plot — and it’s far stronger for it. Brooding, atmospheric synth music also belies the humorous dialogue: this is not a one-dimensional game.

The story is played out through extremely lavish cinematics. From banter-packed one-on-one conversations to exploding planets and basically everything in between, the facial expressions and disintegrating scenery are extremely well realised considering the technology of the age. Within the game itself, simple un-voiced text-boxes provide satsifying chunks of depth (and flippant commentary) for the rest of the setting.

If games have taught me anything, it is that space is dramatic.
If games have taught me anything, it is that space is dramatic.

Sadly, the game itself is extremely questionable. I’m not sure if that’s my innate distaste for turn-basis coming out or the slightly wonky implementation we have here, but whatever it is — it just doesn’t work.

Rather than taking turns in sequence, each character has a turn timer that has to count up before they can do anything. It means that while you’re trying to assign an action an enemy’s timer might expire and they’ll interrupt your train of thought (it’s hard to tell which icon matches which enemy when the camera is flying everywhere too) — and on the flip-side, you’ll spend quite a bit of each battle staring at the meters until they go up… Meters that pause while attack animations and whatnot are playing, so battles with more than four opponents become tiresome awfully fast.

It’s basically the worst of turn-basis and the worst of real-time mashed together: purporting to be strategic and thoughtful, but punishing anyone that takes their time over a choice.

By the end of the game, everyone is a giant sack of hit points. Slow fights just get slower.
By the end of the game, everyone is a giant sack of hit points. Slow fights just get slower.

Luckily there isn’t actually that much battling, overall, and it’s not particularly difficult on Normal… Until the final bosses, when you realise you just don’t have the equipment to stomach some pretty poorly designed fights. A few painfully overlong dungeon crawls are scattered throughout the game too.

I guess it’s like Planescape: Torment in that sense, where combat is not… its strongest asset (though I am actually a fan of real-time-with-pause 2nd Edition AD&D, and Torment‘s weirder spells make it even more fun). Unfortunately, there are no conversational shortcuts or easy combat-ending nukes here, so you really do have to suffer through every single battle.

Sounds like my kind of place.
Sounds like my kind of place.

Unfortunately, to add insult to injury, a hideous amount of wandering fills up the time between these turgid fights. The world sprawls and, while it delights with its monolithic tangle of alien architecture and sweeping low-poly vistas, this tangle doesn’t help navigation — points of interest are split up by winding corridors and flow-breaking elevators complete with (yep) unskippable, vomit-inducing camera sweeps. It gets a bit less confusing beyond the titular city-planet, but long corridors and backtracking continue to abound.

Sure, I’ve noted before that some level of wandering and down-time is necessary to soak up the atmosphere and catch your breath, but Anachronox falls just a bit on the wrong side of that line. The long corridors might be due to technical limitations to allow larger seamless areas, but the elevators are just not funny after the first ten times.

o hai thar, Mass Effect!?
o hai thar, Mass Effect!?

It also has a bit of a problem with Sonic Adventureitus — too many minigames spoil the broth. It’s not quite defined entirely by them like the aforementioned folly, but there are perhaps too many for comfort.

The obligatory lockpicking game is a bit pointless when there’s no cost for failure but having to try again, while the obligatory hacking game is marred by awkward cursor hotspots and questionable mouse sensitivity. Every character has their own special skill that can be used out in the world, and each skill requires participation in one of these minigames. They’re not much individually, but put all these niggly little challenges togther and things get nasty.

I'm sure we've all seen this minigame before.
I’m sure we’ve all seen this minigame before.

Beyond that, the main quest itself often descends into variety (is this an admission even from the developers that the core gameplay is flawed?). It has a rail-shooter type section where you operate a space-fighter’s gun turret, it has a few awkward dodge-the-obstacles parts controlled sloppily by the mouse rather than the arrow keys…

All in all: a few amusing bits of cruft that I would gladly have sacrificed for more engaging combat system. Hell, they could have turned them into cinematics, Anachronox is really good at those.

And I thought I was being facetious when I added the Ultimate Crane Game to Project Y4.
And I thought I was being facetious when I added the Ultimate Crane Game to Project Y4.

The Verdict

It’s a real shame. I want to like Anachronox, maybe even love it. It’s brilliantly witty and it’s wonderfully ridiculous in that unrestrained childhood-creativity kind of way. It’s a delight to explore its lavish environments and chat to its peculiar denizens.

It’s just that all of this is wrapped around a game that is at best wonky, and at worst intolerably dull.

Recommended? Erm… If you can stomach the grind, there’s an absolute belter of a story here. Play it on Easy Mode so the fights go in quicker.

Low-poly frowns, smiles and raised eyebrows are more characterful than any normal-mapped stubble.
Low-poly frowns, smiles and raised eyebrows are more characterful than any normal-mapped stubble.

6 thoughts on “Blog 567: Anachronox”

  1. As you I quite liked the world(s), the ideas and the game’s charm. And I hate the navigation/walking, too. Especially the first area was confusing me and when you – spoiler – return after quite time, I immediately lost all my motivation! Never played Anachronox again since then… According to the combat: I don’t recall it as that bad, maybe a bit limited. But I agree that the idea of combining classic JRPG style combat with some western concepts didn’t work out that well.


    1. I’m sure there was more to the battle system than I ever discovered — I never found all the characters’ special skills and barely used the ones I did find. I kept to the high-damage abilities for as quick a finish as possible; it just wasn’t often worth wasting a turn on anything non-lethal because the turns took so long to charge up and even using a simple healing item required a 30-second animation.


  2. I useally don’t have a problem with this kind of gameplay, provided the attack animations don’t last too long and the enemies don’t have too much hp.
    Overly long corridors on the other hand bother me, so I doubt I’ll try this game. Perhaps I should try and install Septerra Core again… darn long game.


    1. I tried Septerra Core some months ago for the very first time and had quite some troubles with it. For me it was far more a “JRPG by western devs gone wrong” than Anachronox. The battles were tiresome, if I recall correctly, and searching the areas, too.


      1. If you don’t like the battles, you won’t like the game. The game is filled to the brim with battles. I liked them though. Selecting a char would pause the game, allowing you to carefully choose what to do. And many attacks had area of effect as circular or in beams, which as far as I know wasn’t that commen back when it was released.
        But it’s also a massive game, it’ll take a lot of time to finish, which I’ve never done. Though mostly because there used to be an area that slowed down for me, my current laptop should be able to handle that better. (seriously, an isomatric rpg that runs on win98 yet has a recommended memory of 1GB?)
        Anyway, I’ve gone farther with this game than I’ve done with any turn based rpg out there. (except lufia, but that’s just because that game didn’t last as long)


    2. The attack animations last faaar too long, and as the game goes on, they get worse. Each is amusing the first few times, but it gets tired realllllly fast.


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